Get Smart: Rub-a-Dub-Dub... Three Spies in a Sub


I had probably better apologise in advance because this post is bound to be even less focussed than usual. I had several posts in mind but none of them has happened because I concluded that it was high time to do something about my laptop. It was an excellent machine, running with no hitches at all, user-friendly, and as fast as lightning, just with the slight problem that the case kept coming apart. This wasn't covered by the warranty from the large (VERY large, and familiar to anyone in the UK because of its red signs) second-hand dealer I bought it from, so I got a man in town to mend it and when it looked like it was coming apart again, sold it back to them before it actually came apart again. And this is how, despite having been very happy with them for years, I'm slightly shocked that they bought that load of rubbish off me. I bought another off them because the credit they gave me couldn't be refused and even though the Dell one I bought wasn't advertised as such when it came it proved to be bright pillar box red and I loved it the instant I opened it. I have therefore spent a few days clearing the old one and copying all my stuff to the new one.

Anyway, as I keep commenting on these 1960s shows, why the hell would you be frightened of computers when the really scary thing is the human programming them or selling them to you? That is certainly the case in this episode of Get Smart where the objective is to destroy a master KAOS computer masterminding their piracy operation. I think that in these earlier series of Get Smart the intention to parody Bond, etc, is more apparent. This mission is so massive it's basically impossible, and involves pretty much every piece of spy equipment ever conceived. Except of course that in CONTROL's version ear rings feature highly. 99 lists the ridiculous equipment while Smart demonstrates his inability to get into a hammock.

The episode uses footage from the 1957 film The Enemy Below, set in the second world war and thus about US vs German warfare at sea. It has a partial subject matter of the competence of the commander and so there's a comparison to, well, every day at both KAOS and CONTROL. It's funny the way the KAOS crew are easily bought and not the brightest - they think of their non-existent wives and children when 99 tells them to. Another comparison to The Enemy Below is when they release oil to make it look as if the submarine has failed, and in the film they set fires on the deck of the submarine to make it look as if it was more damaged than it was. Playing dead, basically.

The other way in which I'm going to get off the subject is that when I was reading round on this episode I used the Ecosia search engine to search for 'Get Smart Rub-a-Dub-Dub Three Spies in a Sub' and looked at the images tab. I was surprised to find that it was full of pictures of people's kids in the bath that they've put online (perhaps I was wrong and the computer is more sinister than I thought it was) but what the hell are people doing putting pictures of their kids naked online? Are they insane? So the thought I had at first is reinforced: the computer gets things wrong but doesn't compare to the sheer stupidity of humans.

I don't have any criticism of this show: it's a perfectly timed and paced parody of the spy genre, crossing over a bit into the genre of war films.

My absolutely favourite bits are the way the submariners wolf whistle at 99 as she enters the submarine and Smart makes out they're whistling at him, and the fact they've gone on a mission to a distant island with a map of Los Angeles.